Today I just finished up my fifth week of my new very temporary job as a grocery shopper for group homes. I have shopped about 50 times, at the mercy of their shopping lists and their schedules, not knowing if I will have a full day or be waiting in my car for hours on a call that may or may not happen. I try to be chipper, greeting them as early as I am able (sometimes very hung over, the only way I can sleep a full night). It's a good thing they can't see my face behind the mask; as long as my eyes "smile" they don't have to know.
It has been a roller coaster of emotions this past month and a half.
I had the virus, and it wrecked me for the better part of a week. I said my goodbyes. I purged my life and came to peace with my life that I had, then things turned and I regained my straight. I started tasting again and could go for walks (not to the bathroom and back to bed). REAL walks.
Life got better, but I still feel so empty. Am I just paddling in a circle?
I just signed a lease for a new move in as little as two weeks. It's free, in exchange for services provided to my downstairs neighbors (cleaning mostly). The family is amazing and very understanding. If I move again in a year I will lose it, mentally.
My life is still is boxes.
I feel lost.
